However

I watched the mother of a dead girl speaking at her only child's memorial service; the anguish and loss and profound grief so overwhelmed me. I, too, am the mother of an only child, a girl. I cannot say that I feel this woman's sorrow; I do not, cannot feel that; the mere thinking of such a tragedy is not something that my head or my heart can even begin to process. I'm so sorry it's you; I'm so glad it's not me - that fine line becomes invisible. But my sympathy for this woman, who lost her best friend, her beautiful child, her blessed daughter, runs deep and true.

I know that a parent of seven children feels this same sorrow. Yet, I have to believe that it is different, somehow. No other child will ever or can ever take the place of the one who has died; no matter how many children there are in the world, there is only one of each. But their babies depend on them to help cope with their sadness; the parenting must go on.

I am the sister of a boy who died. My mother's loss was tremendous, I know. She could not be a mom anymore. My brother died; my father took from me what my mother, in her unimaginable grief, could no longer give him. I not only lost my big brother, I lost my mother and myself as well.

But I don't know gone without good-bye

If I could reach the sky I'd bring her right back to your arms
Though I haven't seen your girl, she's forever in my life

BRIAN LITTRELL - GONE WITHOUT GOODBYE